The Voice, NBC's heavily hyped rival to American Idol, premiered last night with a two-hour episode that sought to prove this series isn't concerned about its contestants' looks (because nobody in the music biz gives a hoot about frivolous things like beauty, right? Right? Hello?) and explain the most complex reality-show rules since The Mole. The public was interested in seeing what this thing was all about -- nearly 12 million viewers tuned in -- but critics were split as to whether seeing Christina Aguilera spin around like Doctor Evil for 120 minutes was time well spent.

What did we enjoy most? The new likable Christina Aguilera! Cee Lo Green's Misfits T-shirt! Those high-tech chairs!

What did the critics who liked the show praise the most? The chance to see four big stars banter as they battled for team members (Yahoo!'s own Reality Rocks), Aguilera's saucy dominance of the squad of coaches (Billboard), and the interesting mix of talent auditioning (Rolling Stone).

And then

Earlier this month, Beyoncé got involved with Michelle Obama's "Let's Move!" campaign aimed at preventing childhood obesity, reworking her 2007 track "Get Me Bodied" into "Move Your Body" a.k.a. "Stop Playing Xbox and Eat a Damn Carrot or You Will Never Look as Fierce as I Do." Today her full-length video for the song arrived (via Rap Up), essentially a step-by-step instructional guide to relatively simple choreography that's more "Sweatin' to the Oldies" than "Single Ladies." And while the kids cast in the clip set in a school cafeteria are holding their own doing the Dougie next to Beyoncé... they are still dancing next to Beyoncé, which is like giving a biology lecture standing beside the Shiba Inu puppy cam. B wraps the clip waving an American flag and chomping on an apple, which is about as patriotic as you can get.

The folks suing Mrs. Jay-Z over so-called "morally reprehensible" behavior this week must be pretty bummed their $100 million lawsuit hit TMZ the same day as this

When you pack 50,000 fans of Metallica, Slayer, Megadeth, and Anthrax into one location -- in this case, the Big Four's concert this weekend at Indio, California -- and add heat and alcohol, on paper it seems like you've got a recipe for disaster. Flashbacks of Altamont and Woodstock '99 instantly come to mind. But the police reports from the Big Four show are in... and surprisingly, metal fans didn't cause too much trouble. Roughly two-dozen people were arrested on charges ranging from drug possession to being "drunk and disorderly," KPSP Local 2 News reports, but that's the normal police blotter following any big show. As far as we know, no Metallica fans were used as a urinal this time around.

By comparison, over the course of Coachella's three days at the same venue the weekend before, there were 79 arrests. That means the arrest-per-day ratio for the high-decibel Big Four show and the indie rock-leaning Coachella was basically the same. Stack both those numbers against the 114

A few years ago, Roger Waters had a near-tragedy at Coachella when his flying pig broke free and soared into the desert sky, ultimately landing on someone's driveway in the form of pulled pork. This year, Coachella was prop-heavy thanks to the arrival of the Creators Project, the partnership between Vice and Intel that yielded Spiritualized's insanely cool installation and the release of 2,000 LED-lit balls during Arcade Fire's set. The balls, which dropped from above during "Wake Up," were part of a piece called Summer Into Dust that continued after the festival ended -- folks lucky enough to walk away with one of the orbs can share stories about where they wound up and change its batteries for ongoing fun.

But one poor soul seems to have misplaced his beloved Arcade FireBall and posted the following in Craigslist's Lost & Found section (we would have put it in Missed Connections): "Lost - My fireball from Arcade Fire's Coachella show. Beautiful lost moments shared with my ball.