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New Coldplay Lyrics Funnier Than ‘Hangover 2′

Trust us, we saw this weekend despite our own advice, so we know firsthand that Coldplay's new lyrics are funnier than that unnecessary sequel. It's been a long three years since Viva la Vida or Death and All His Friends, but the band is back with a fresh single due out this weekend, the equally annoyingly titled "Every Teardrop Is a Waterfall." Over the Memorial Day break, Coldplay tweeted brief snippets of the track, which will premiere on Friday at their official site, but this morning, drummer Will Champion shared the lyrics to the song, and they're uproarious.

Chris Martin's poetry has never been the bright spot for the band -- melodies are their thing -- and while Martin spent the early part of Coldplay's career trying to turn the band into the next Radiohead with some downer lyrics, he's fallen into a more U2 niche, which is also fine to his millions of (probably virgin) fans. By title alone, "Every Teardrop Is a Waterfall" conjures up visions of TLC covering the Smashing Pumpkins' Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness. Lyrically, this is some of what we're working with: "Maybe the streets alight, maybe the trees are gone, I feel my heart start being to my favourite song" and "I turn the music up, I'm on a roll this time, and heaven is in sight." But the highlight is when things get phonetic: "Oh, it was a wa wa wa wa wa-aterfall, a wa wa wa wa wa-aterfall." We can almost picture Martin bleating out those "Wa Wa's."

That's the single artwork up top, and as promised, the band does seem to be inspired by "graffiti art of the '70s in New York" in some respects. We don't want to get too down on "Every Teardrop Is a Waterfall" yet because the song itself might end up being a spectacular, "Clocks 2.0" track. (Mortal god Brian Eno did produce it, after all.) Until Friday though, we're gonna have some fun with these rhymes, lacing "maybe I'm the gap between the two trapezes" into everyday conversation.

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