Blog Posts by John Kordosh

Hello, readers. Once again, it's time to explain this blog: what it is and why it exists. Pull up a chair!

Framed posts a new music video every week. Usually a very popular music video. We watch it and then we watch it again, this time freezing the video in key spots. We cull a still picture -- a frame, if you will -- at that point, and then write a funny caption for it.

See, that's what makes Framed different from the other Y! Music blogs. We actually try to be funny, on purpose. We may not always succeed -- humor is a subjective thing, after all -- but we're always in there, trying. We take this blog very seriously.

Except for last week; we phoned in that one. As you noticed.

This week we welcome back the great Taylor Swift, the gal who's pretty much owned the charts for the last couple of years. We've got her just-released-last-week hit, "22," in which she simply sings about the joys of being a young woman. It's a good song and a good video... light-hearted but meaningful.

Have fun, enjoy Taylor and our captions, and be back next week when things turn deadly serious!

Let's see. Wonder what's up in Framed this week. Country music? Nope, just did that. Quality indie rock? Nope, just did that band, fun. American Idol? Yeah, like anybody cares about that! Make us laugh!

Justin Bieber? Nope, but soon! Always soon with that guy.

Oh, here's the list. Wow, time for hip-hop. Again? Guess so. OK, good deal. Now let's bounce around the ping pong balls with the names of every credible hip-hop artist in existence. Where the heck did we get all these ping pong balls, anyway? Can you just buy them somewhere?

And how can we have all these ping pong balls and not remember where we got them? That's like we're going crazy or something.

And ... the winner is ... Nelly! OK, that's good. All of his albums have gone Top 10. He's won Grammys. He's solid. Plus he's got that new song, "Hey Porsche."

He'll probably inspire some good captions, too. How the heck would we make a living if we couldn't write captions? We'd have to dig ditches or something, probably. That'd be a drag.

Now if we just didn't have to write that darned intro.

It turns out that red is no longer just a color. And it's not merely how we'd describe Mao Tse-Tung or Cincinnati's excellent first baseman, Joey Votto. It's not even just what we're in after we get a check from Y! Music! and then pay our bills.

Indeed, Red is also a band. A rock band. A hard rock band.

Sometimes they're referred to as RED and sometimes as R3D. Both are equally cool.

Red is from Tennessee, which is in Alabama. They're a Christian band and were the first band in Christian rock history to have a song debut at No. 1 ("Fight Inside" in 2008, in Radio & Records.) They haven't won any Grammys, but they've got a boatload of GMA (Gospel Music Association) Dove Awards, which are exactly the same, only holier.

Framed, of course, is exceptionally devout, so we humbly welcome Red to our slice of the internet. We confess that it's our great privilege to present Red's video for "Perfect Life," complete with funny captions that they -- and you! -- will enjoy immensely!

Everybody likes funny captions!

Isn't it time you, er, "read" them?

Do you get it?

Long-time readers -- and we mean really long-time readers -- may remember that the very first guest artist featured here in Framed was Justin Timberlake. And Scarlett Johansson was in it, too!

Those were the days! Why, it seems just like yesterday...

(Weird music signaling flashback.)

Six years ago... Dave DiMartino had invited us to his home, a Hollywood Xanadu tucked into the hills above a struggling city. We found him in his sitting room.

"How would you like to write a 'blog' for Yahoo! Music?" he said, drawing on his pipe.

"A web log, eh? Well, that depends." We sipped our shot of 64-year-old single malt scotch while Dave drank out of the bottle. "Could we refer to ourselves in the third person?

"Absolutely! That's a given!"

"And would we get paid really well and in a very timely fashion?"

"Week in, week out," he lied, scowling at his pipe briefly, and tamping it down. He continued...

Well, we ended up watching the Grammys last week, even though we were plenty miffed about that Justin Bieber snub.

We decided to take the high road, readers.åPlus there were no basketball games on.

And, although the Grammys were spectacular in every way imaginable, we were most entertained by fun., the NYC indie combo who not only stole the show with their rain-soaked performance of "Carry On," but also won awards for Best New Artist and Song of the Year.

Yes, everything's comin' up fun.!

Deciding we should have fun. in Framed, we went over to vevo.com -- Y! Music's very able video source and partner -- and figured 2009's "All The Pretty Girls" would be a winning addition to the Framed canon.

You're sure to agree that Framed continues to simply get better every week and that reading it is now #1 on your priority list!

Because why not?

Na zdrowie!

We're sure that plenty of Y! Music's bloggers are talking about the 55th Annual Grammy Awards this week, but we're not going there.

No way. Uh uh. Not us.

Not this time.

When we heard that Justin Bieber, who has more Twitter followers than anyone else in the world, and who is almost single-handedly responsible for the massive success of Framed, was denied even a single Grammy nomination, we questioned not only their, but our own sanity.

Seriously, Grammys. You're playing ball with Mumford & Sons and you can't even let Justin into the on-deck circle? Do you want us to come over there?

Well, we have no words. This may be the greatest injustice civilization has seen since slavery.

But not to worry, readers. Our video is the great, new, acoustic version of "As Long As You Love Me," a critical sensation and a massive favorite of listeners everywhere. Furthermore, the easy-going Justin, unfazed by the colossal Grammy snub, promised our readers a surprise in this week's captions.

What could it be? Let's find out!

Every now and again, we like to feature a country music video here in Framed. It's because we're a big tent, we are, and we want all of our many, many thousands and millions of readers to feel welcome.

This week we've got Trace Adkins, the "Celebrity Apprentice" finalist, with his 2006 hit, "Ladies Love Country Boys." It's one of his three singles that have hit #1 on the country charts, and you won't be surprised it did. The feel-good, light-spirited video shows Trace being pursued by scores of hot women, who -- despite their urbanity and obvious success -- simply cannot be around a country boy without, well... you know.

"Being amorous." We wanted to put it another way, but this is a family website.

Still, there's no doubt you'll find the whole event tremendously entertaining, or our name isn't Framed. Be back here again next week, when we write yet another intro and another dozen captions and then get really drunk! Life is just a skit!

So there we were, watching the second inauguration of Mr. President Obama, wondering who could top James Taylor and Kelly Clarkson, when Beyonce showed up to sing "The Star Spangled Banner."

"Why, Beyonce sounds terrific!" we said out loud. Toy-Bot, The Good Cat, who was sitting on our lap, agreed in the strange language of his people, the cats. We petted him.

Satisfied with a great show, we forgot all about it until the next day. Then we read that people were saying Beyonce hadn't sung "The Star Spangled Banner" live, but had -- in fact -- lip-synched it!

"Oh no!" we cried to The Good Cat, who was still on our lap. "Beyonce is a big cheater! The internet doesn't lie, except for our part of the internet, of course."

Then, the day after that, we heard she actually did sing it live. WTF?

"This must be a signal to put Beyonce in Framed again," we mused in confusion. "Because everything is about us." Scooting over to Vevo, we decided that, this week, we would go with "I Was Here," her vid for last year's World Humanitarian Day. In it, we find Beyonce at the United Nations, lip-synching the song. Images of outer space and poverty-stricken lands abound.

And then The Good Cat bit us. Really hard.