The calling from on high was clear: DO A BLOG OF LISTS.
People, apparently, love lists. It helps with food shopping. It helps with chores. It helps with remembering who your favorite guitar players are. And it makes you feel like a better person all around. If someone calls you LISTLESS, that is NOT a compliment.
In the spirit of sharing and forging a relationship with utter millions, I offer you the five most important reasons that this column exists:
To make me feel superior: I can't lie. Like a cable news anchor, I can cut off your mike, but you have to sit and suffer while I pontificate rightly or wrongly and that just feels good.
To give me something to do with useless knowledge: You probably know the feeling. The human brain absorbs crap. We all need a way to get rid of it. This is my way. Thank you for being a friend.
To justify my existence: So often we walk this earth screaming at the sky, "Why me?" Or in the case of the lottery, "Why NOT me?" I'd like to retire to my own
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