Did you hear that?
The late superstar attorney Johnnie Cochran, known for helping keep O.J., Michael Jackson and Snoop Dogg out of jail, has spoken from the dead.
"What!," he said, shocked that R. Kelly's defense team managed to convince a jury of 9 men and 3 women that their client was not guilty of the child pornography charges brought against him in the four week trial.
I bet R. Kelly didn't even think this was possible.Former R. Kelly Protege Says Singer Molested Her Niece.) There were still three other family members of the alleged victim serving as witnesses for R. Kelly's prosecution team. They said that the girl on the tape was not their relative.
In the Thank You credits of R. Kelly's next album we can expect him to send a shout out to that mole on his back because that apparently is what saved him. While the man doing the dirty work in the video had a mark on his back in the same place, the mark was not a mole. So voila, R. Kelly gets off.
When the jury began deliberating yesterday, I knew that it would not take long to reach a verdict. I changed my social networking site status updates to: "Billy wonders how many minutes it's going to take to deliberate the R. Kelly trial," and later, "Billy thinks R. Kelly should remake 'I'm Going Down.'" I could not have been more convinced that R. Kelly was headed to jail.
Maybe it's unfair for me to have reached this conclusion without having been a witness, privy to any special insight or even a juror, but I just never felt good about R. Kelly's innocence.
Call my rationale unsubstantiated, but here are the 7 reasons why I believed he was guilty:
1) The Tape - So, I did see it. I only watched it once. I did not examine it, and I don't own it. I will admit that it was hard to tell for certain that R. Kelly was the man on camera, but as former BET reporter Ed Gordon told Kelly in their interview, Kelly sure looks a lot like the man in the video. I've read reports that the studio where the filming occurred looks like R. Kelly's Chicago recording studio.
2) R. Kelly's History With Aaliyah - May Aaliyah's sweet soul rest in peace. I apologize to Aaliyah's family for even mentioning her here... But we can not ignore that R. Kelly did marry Aaliyah when she was 15. He even had the audacity to produce a record for Aaliyah called "Age Ain't Nothing But A Number." I don't believe in coincidences.
3) R. Kelly's Lyrical Content - R. Kelly is a musical genius. He has an undeniable catalog of songs produced for himself and some of the biggest names in the business, Michael, Janet, Celine, but something is not right. Maybe it's his inner rapper, but songs like "It Seems Like You're Ready," "Feelin' On Yo Booty," and "You Remind Me Of Something," spell guilty to me.
4) The BET Ed Gordon Interview - I don't know one person who watched this interview and afterwards felt that R. Kelly made a good impression. He was visibly sweating. He was either partying with Whitney Houston or lying. I wish this could have been done on that new polygraph TV show The Moment Of Truth. (Get Ed Gordon interview details.)
Hear Trey's take.) But Chapter 5 is where it should have stopped. I hosted a little "Trapped In The Closet" party at work for my 35th birthday, and we watched the DVD. When the midget jumped from underneath the kitchen sink in Chapter 7, 8 or 9, I was done. I knew that R. Kelly was a sick man with extremely poor judgment. He clearly did not know when to stop. This was another sign of his guilt.
6) The Subliminal Message Factor - I know there's got to be a subliminal message embedded in the "Step In The Name Of Love" record. I bet if you play it backwards, you will hear Kells saying, "Don't believe the hype. I'm innocent." It is a great record, no doubt. This is what saved R. Kelly's fan base. Once the allegations dropped, Jay-Z pulled out of their Best Of Both Worlds promotion. "Step In The Name Of Love" was R. Kelly's secret weapon. Even though the public was outraged and ready to cast blame on R. Kelly, "Step In The Name Of Love" was so good and so on time for R&B music that many of us turned our heads. How shameful. But we were hypnotized.
I don't care what the jury decided. I rest my case.