Hilly Kristal, founder of the Bowery bar CBGBs, is dead. Unlike you and me, he was part of history. He almost outlived his famed establishment, which was shutdown last October because it is now illegal to operate a rock 'n' roll club in Manhattan. Rock 'n' roll being the devil's music, this is understandable. However, hundreds of thousands of absolutely terrible bands played his club. Not anything like Good Charlotte, but close. On any given night you could have your ears blown out by a level of volume and incompetence that most people believed you could only get in New Jersey.

However, there were also several successful bands from the 1970s that went on to great things and came to define the "PUNK ROCK SOUND," which as you'll notice wasn't really a sound back then. And then there were a few others who people speak of respectfully. In any case, narrowing it down to five bands made if difficult. Surely, the Dead Boys and Richard Hell and the Voidoids and Suicide should be on this list.

Unlike brothers who fight all the time, sisters work together to overcome oppression, unfair and discriminatory labor practices, war, famine and their annoying brothers. Therefore, it should come as little surprise that when sisters get together to work, it is often in harmonious glee. While I'm sure most of my readership will be wondering why the Andrew Sisters didn't make this list, let me just repeat my usual defense: it's all in the mathematical computations. I've got this computer - the ORB 2003-X4-109 - and it does everything for me. Including write this column. Thanks, Orb.

Now the Five Best Sister Acts:

Jessica and Ashlee Simpson: These two are so good and so talented that they're not allowed to perform together. There isn't a stage strong enough to hold the two of them  And besides, you can make twice as much money if you perform separately, a fact that isn't lost on them or their dear old dad. What I find absolutely fascinating about these two is how one of them has blonde

If all the hype is to be believed, Elvis Presley was once a bigger star than Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance and Shakira combined. Personally, I like to remain skeptical about these things. I like to let history decide who will be the winners. So, I have quite a wait on my hands. These acts have to die and then add thirty years before the real decision is made.

So, for now, with reservations, I'm willing to say that Elvis Presley sure was popular in his day and people seem to really like the guy. Heck, Paul Simon named an album after the guy's house!

Sure are a lot of books about him and most of them are big and heavy. But, you have to ask yourself, is the cultural impact anything like what's happening with The Two Coreys?

However, I'm always touched when other people pay tribute. If you do a websearch looking for Elvis tributes, you'll give yourself a headache. Trust me, I speak from experience. Most people's idea of a tribute is to blather on endlessly and tastelessly until there

If it's pop music, there has to be a gimmick: something to make you ignore how fundamentally horrible the truth at hand really is and instead focus on how everything is suddenly cool, shiny and NEW. Most "artists" decide to use scantily clad women to get this message across. In some cases, the guys put on make-up and wear frilly clothes. At one time, bands made big, expensive, flashy videos that had nothing to do with the song but made them look tougher and taller than they actually were. Then they'd find an attractive woman and slather oil over her body until she shined. Sometimes they let these women handle power tools, though I'm not sure of the significance. Quite innovative, in some respects.

Then there are those who understand the importance in a name. I know Shakespeare suggested a rose would smell just as sweet if it were called a colonoscopy but then he lacked the courage to give his plays names that would sell. "Romeo And Juliet" just doesn't have much going for it. And