As the great philosopher-movie star-country singer-hat wearing superstar Jerry Reed once said, "When You're Hot, You're Hot." When you're in the zone, you don't question it. God just might've given us ELEVEN commandments if Moses hadn't been in such a hurry to get down the damned mountain. So here are five more predictions that you can take to the bank!
1) The music industry will be involved in a scandal that reveals that computers are now responsible for the making of most music. Yes, it will come to light that just as Milli Vanilli didn't sing on their own records, most of today's musicians don't actually play on their own records. That, in fact, much of what the listening audience is hearing is music made by MACHINES. This devastating revelation will cause listeners to become angry and confused. And cause the music industry to take a long hard look at what it's become. We're only moments away from a new musical revolution when quality groups such as the Spice Girls and Sigue Sigue Sputnik ruled the airwaves. Bring on the good ol' days, shorty.
3) Emo music will continue to meet emotional guidelines. As you well know, in order for "Emo" bands to qualify as such they must meet strict "Emo" eligibility requirements. Losing the precious "emo" tag can cost a band millions. So it will come as no surprise that in 2008 all current and potential "emo" bands will meet their "emotional quotient" with songs that are sung with full-on unrestrained emotionality, no matter the subject matter. Be it lost pets, dead mothers, evil girlfriends, or rain on a hamburger.
4) Movies Will Continue To Be Popular With Youngsters. Yes, fads like the Internet will come and go and flash in the pan music stars like Madonna and Billy Ray Cyrus will attempt their annual comebacks, but movies, that moneymaking Hollywood machine, will continue to enthrall our nation's youngsters, who never seem to tire of the novelty of seeing people prettier than them speaking words and driving their cars to Sheryl Crow songs. Is everyday a winding road? Maybe not, but MOST of them are. I tell you that.