Somehow, February got listed as Pet Adoption Month. Yeah, I know, you can hear the celebrations all around! Who hasn't been to a pet store or shelter and ended up bringing home a pet they have no idea how to care for? Who isn't going to end up a lonely old cat person? Or be known to the neighbors as that 'weird guy with all the dogs'? There comes a time in everyone's life when they realize they have nothing in common with their fellow man except a need to watch them blow it on Deal Or No Deal. After that, animals are our only friends. Because they don't know how stupid we really are. They think we know something.
"(How Much Is That) Doggie In The Window?"--Patti Page: I can't believe I'm wasting such a great parenthetical song here, but Patti Page's enduring question remains unanswered and considering inflation is probably not something that should be mentioned in a song because it could potentially date it in ways no songwriter interested in writing timeless classics would do.Three Legged Cat"--Red House Painters: Mark Kozelek of Red House Painters, a friend of this blog, writes songs that sell! Just as Fred Flintstone learned in his short time as a songwriter people like love songs and songs about mother. So Kozelek has written both of those and then he also noted--transcending Flintstone here, I should note--that people like songs about animals. Kozelek being a natural cat lover combined his love for cats with his love for popular song and with it "Cat Rock" was born.
"Me And You And A Dog Named Boo"--Lobo: Ah, not to sound like a Time-Life commercial but the '70s were a time when people performed songs about horses, dogs, cats, crocodiles that could rock, Jesus Christ Superstar, a time when it was as if the whole world was suddenly available to be written about in ways never previously explored and you could do so without fear of reprisal. No matter how laidback you got, there was something looking to lay even further back. Pass the coconut oil, I'm getting myself a tan just thinking about it.Year Of The Cat"--Al Stewart: I'm not even sure this song has a melody. I can't sing it. I can only talk it with a sly wink in my voice. If ever there was a song that would make you adopt a pet it's this one. The song is so smooth you don't think of all the possible pitfalls, the urine accidents, the crap scooping, the walking, the petting, the constant shoveling of expensive food into their mouths. No, you think, man, I'm never going to get a girlfriend anyway, so I might as well adopt something that won't notice or care how ugly I really am. It works, too.
Animals--Pink Floyd: Not a song but an entire album dedicated to animals! Dogs, Pigs and Sheep, to be exact. If more musicians were to follow Pink Floyd's lead, I'm sure we could put an end to war because when you're too busy singing about animals you can't be blowing some guy's head off!
- Mark Kozelek