Reality Rocks

America’s Next Top Inmate?

As an avid lover of both indie rock and reality TV, I was naturally thrilled when, way back in season 1 of America's Next Top Model, these two seemingly disparate worlds collided and third-place finalist Elyse Sewell received an on-camera personal visit from her then-boyfriend, Marty Crandall of the Shins. Reality and rock are two great tastes that taste great together, in my opinion (hence this blog), so the two of them became my own personal It Couple.

But it seems their relationship has taken on a much more sour taste now, as both claim the other has recently exhibited less-than-model behavior.

See, Marty was charged with two felonies--domestic violence and corporal injury--and held on $25,000 bail last Friday, after Elyse accused him of beating her up in a Sacramento hotel room. Elyse too was arrested, though she insists (in an entry that she has since pulled from her personal blog) that Marty chomped on his own flesh to create bite marks and subsequently have her unjustly charged with assault as well.  

Although Elyse's original blog post about the incident is gone, she did post this later explanation:

"Hi guys! I'm feeling much better on this new day (after sleeping until noon). I've decided to heed the advice of many commenters (lawyerly types) and friends-lock my last entry about the legal foibles between me and my ex-boyfriend."

Meanwhile, Sub Pop Records issued this vague statement on their multi-instrumentalist client's behalf:

"Marty Crandall and his ex-girlfriend Elyse Sewell were both arrested over the weekend following an argument at a Sacramento hotel which resulted in hotel staff calling the police. They were both taken into police custody and released over the weekend. There will be no further comment at this time and we would appreciate their privacy being respected."

This scandal in fact shocks me--after all, when Natalie Portman declared in Garden State that the Shins could change one's life, I never thought she was referring to something like this. (More like RUIN one's life!) But considering that the Shins have songs with titles like "Caring Is Creepy," "Fighting In A Sack," "Pink Bullets," "Kissing The Lipless," "Weird Divide," and "The Celibate Life," maybe there were clues to the supposed It Couple's problems in the band's catalog all along.

I can't take sides in this case because obviously I don't know who is telling the truth. (Marty's due back in court January 9.) I just hope this mess gets sorted out...and that the woman who beat out Elyse in ANTM season 1, Adrienne Curry, has better luck with her celebrity mate (Christopher Knight of The Brady Bunch) when season 3 of My Fair Brady soon airs on VH1.

In the meantime, enjoy this clip of an Elyse-less Shins playing in the Yahoo! Music studio in happier times:

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