Reality Rocks

Simon Cowell Claims He’s What “America Deserves” In Election-Style Smear Campaign

It's election time, and even though he's not a U.S. citizen, Simon Cowell still nobly wants to stress the importance of voting this November...for "The X Factor," of course, after the show goes live on November 1. Yep, leave it to Simon to always have his priorities in the right place.

And of course, Simon specifically wants us Yanks to vote for his "X Factor" category, the Groups. So he's waged a ruthless (as in ruthlessly funny) smear campaign against his rival judges--Britney Spears, Demi Lovato, and L.A. Reid--in Fox's latest promo clip. "I'm Simon Cowell, and I approve this message," he states in the video, unsurprisingly. But you know what? I approve it too. Because this video is rather hilarious:

Simon doesn't hold back in the new politically incorrect promo, accusing his co-stars/opponents of being morally bankrupt unprofessionals who constantly cross lines of propriety when dealing with the show's innocent contestants. Britney "flirts with contestants," L.A. is "suggestive," Demi "crosses physical boundaries," and all three "refuse to remain impartial," the clip scandalously claims. But the ad's most crucial sloganeering? Its bold declaration that Simon is the judge that "America deserves...a mentor who cares about himself 100 percent."

Well, at least there's some truth to this advertising, since the clip mentions no contestants by name and barely even shows the contestants at all, focusing instead on Simon, Simon, Simon. Which category "X Factor" viewers actually vote for will, hopefully, depend on the top 16 semifinalists' performances. But regardless, get ready to rock the vote when "The X Factor" goes live next month.

In the meantime, check out the judges' also-amusing reactions to this week's presidential debate:

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