To be perfectly fair, we all have our own blasts from our past that are a tad bit embarrassing.
You know, like naked baby photos of us in bathtubs or stomach-down on bearskin rugs. Or pizza-faced preteen snapshots that resemble "Before" photos from ProActiv print ads. Or mall-haired high school yearbook pics that are just begging to have a Glamour magazine "do's-&-don'ts" black bar slapped smack across the eyes.
Luckily for most of us, such damning evidence of our past uncoolness remains safely hidden away in shoeboxes, parents' attics, and in extreme cases, the ashes of a fireplace.
Sure, we all have proverbial skeletons in our closets. But for those who go on American Idol, such skeletons come marching straight out into broad daylight like an elaborate Dia De Los Muertos parade. And there ain't no shoebox, attic, or fireplace that keep those skeletons secret for long.
I am, of course, referring to "Messed Around," the incredibly incriminating and decidedly non-rockin' video by Boyz N Girlz United, the not-exactly-Daughtryish former group of bandanna-swathed American Idol hopeful Robbie "I'm Not A Pop Singer" Carrico.
Robbie looks pretty different now with his new Puddle Of Muddy persona, but he's still easy to spot in the "Messed Around" video, since his name is helpfully spelled out in a friendly, Nickelodeonish font across the screen.
Man, based on this cheesier-than-Cheetos clip, it's no wonder Simon Cowell isn't yet convinced that Robbie's a real "rocker." Will America's voters be convinced? Not if they see this first. But then again, this video is from the year 2000, and admittedly a lot can change in eight years. For instance, based on Robbie's own before-&-after pic at right, it definitely looks like he's gone through puberty since then!
Anyway, watch "Messed Around" and make up your own mind about Robbie's rockin'-ness: