So last week Kanye made headlines for showing up almost two hours late for his Bonnaroo gig--and consequently getting Bonna-booed by angry audience members. And this week, Kanye is making headlines for doing what every tough, fiery-tempered rapper does when dissed...um, he's blogging. And he's typing almost entirely in ALL CAPS! Ooh, watch out!
Yes, Kanye is mad, and he's not going to take it anymore."This Bonnaroo thing is the worst insult I've ever had in my life. This is the most offended I've ever been...this is the maddest I ever will be," he spewed this week on his official website, kanyeuniversity.com.
(Hmmmm. You'd think he would have been more offended/mad about his mother Donda's botched/fatal surgery, or when he was completely shut out at last year's VMAs, or when Evel Knievel sued him, or when his engagement was called off, or when he went on that Hurricane Katrina telethon and made those anti-Bush comments, one when that woman beat him with a shovel in his bizarre "Flashing Lights" music video, etc...but hey, everyone has their own breaking point, we suppose. Anyway, after this grammatically and typographically correct opening statement, Kanye apparently hit the capslock button on his Macbook Air and went positively ballistic. And we quote (FYI, all caplocked expletives have been excised for easily offended readers' protection, not to mention to save space...although Kanye's spelling errors have been left totally intact, just for personality's sake):
But wait, there's more! This is regarding all the liquid on the Bonnaroo stage, the residue of angry concertgoers' beer-tossing protests:
"I STEPPED ON THE FRONT PART OF MY STAGE AND THERE WAS SO MUCH LIQUID ON THE STAGE I COULDN'T MOVE WITHOUT SLIPPING. I HAD TO ADJUST MY WHOLE PERFORMANCE STYLE BECAUSE OF IT. A FEW MORE SONGS IN AND THE SONG WAS ON IT'S WAY UP.. I CUT A FEW SONGS FROM THE SET BECAUSE I WANTED PEOPLE 2 EXPERIENCE STRONGER WHILE THERE WAS STILL SOME DARKNESS TO PERFORM IT IN. I'VE STRUGGLED WITH STRONGER FROM IT'S CONCEPTION. REMEMBER LAST SUMMER WHEN I CANCELED SOME TV APPEARANCES. IT WAS BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO PERFORM STRONGER IN THE DAYTIME. ANYONE WHO CAME TO THE GLOW TOUR CAN UNDERSTAND WHY I WANTED PEOPLE TO SEE IT PROPERLY. IT BROKE MY HEART THAT I COULDN'T GIVE THESE FANS STRONGER IN IT'S GREATEST FORM... BY THE TIME I GOT TO STRONGER IT WAS DAYTIME AND IT BROKE MY HEART. I'M SORRY TO EVERYONE THAT I DIDN'T HAVE THE ABILITY 2 GIVE THE PERFORMANCE I WANTED TO. I'M SORRY... SOMETIMES I GO 2, 3 DAYS W/O SLEEP WORKING ON MY PERFORMANCE... I HAVE TO ICE MY KNEES AFTER EVERY SHOW AND THEY HURT WHEN I WALK THROUGH THE AIRPORT... HAVING AN EXPENSIVE STAGE CUTS MY PAYDAY IN HALF... CALL ME WHAT YOU WANT BUT NEVER SAY I DIDN'T GIVE MY ALL!!!
Oh, if only Amy Winehouse blogged so eloquently and passionately whenever she was in the news. Of course, if she did, she'd have pretty bad carpal tunnel syndrome by now. And gawd knows she doesn't need any more health problems. She's already reportedly suffering from a nasty skin infection called impetigo, and she was hospitalized last week after a fainting spell...and now this week, her father Mitch told the press that her crack and cigarette smoking have so damaged her lungs that she is at risk for emphysema and even death if she doesn't clean up soon.
Amy's spokeswoman, Tracey Miller, refuted Mitch's claims, saying: "She is not diagnosed with full-blown emphysema, but instead has early signs of what could lead to emphysema." Hmmmm. You know, that still doesn't sound too good to us, really...but we guess this means there's still some hope for Amy and her addled organs. Hopefully she'll have more than 70 percent lung capacity to draw from when she attempts to belt it out at Nelson Mandela's 90th birthday concert in London this week.
Another British singer often in trouble with the law, and with drugs, is gender-bending Culture Club frontman Boy George. The '80s icon had planned a U.S. tour for July 2008--which was to include a free concert for the NYC Department Of Sanitation to thank them for their kindness when he performed court-ordered community service in his 2006 New York drug case.
Guess immigration officials really did want to hurt George.
On a semi-related note, troubled country singer Mindy McCready--who is on probation for her own 2004 drug charge--was arrested and charged with probation violation this week, for supposedly falsifying her community service records.
So, will Tim blog about this incident? And will he do so in all caps? Probably not, but stay tuned...
And finally, on the subject of men harassing women, a Nashville clubber was charged with disorderly conduct and public intoxication after he reportedly accosted Cher at the Tootsie's Orchid Lounge. Police say Calvin Hutton Houghland was asked to leave Tootsie's after repeatedly hassling Cher--and though Calvin initially complied with security's request, he returned to the club a short time later and grabbed the one-named diva by her famously nipped-in waist. Cher actually declined to prosecute following this incident, but oddly, Calvin asked to be arrested. He then promptly, and perhaps unsurprisingly, failed a self-requested sobriety test.
And thus concludes another confusing, bemusing, and occasionally amusing week in news. Come back next Friday for more updates--and until then, goodnight, and good music.
THIS WEEK'S TOP 10 STORIES:
1) Capital Punishment - Kanye West strikes back at his Bobbaroo bullies, via an aggressively all-capped blog.
2) Amy's Smokin' Performance - If she doesn't lay off the pipe, she may permanently damage her vocal pipes.
3) Boy George's Sanitation Department Concert Plans Trashed - U.S. immigration officials deny him a tour visa.
4) Tim McGraw Doesn't Like It, Doesn't Love It, Wants No More Of It - He throws an onstage fit after a concertgoer misbehaves.
5) Cher-ing Is Not Caring - A man harasses Cher, gets arrested.
6) McCready Acts Seedy - Mindy is arrested for allegedly falsifying documents.
7) American Bridal - Idol album Ruben Studdard and his girlfriend take out a marriage license.
8) Coldplay On A Hot Streak - The Brits break an iTunes records and sell 721,000 albums in one week.
9) Back In The Day - Morris Day & The Time are reuniting for their first album in 18 years.
10) Slash Hits The Skid - The GNR/Velvet Revolver axeman has recruited ex-Skid Row singer Sebastian Bach for a "top-secret" project.
- Arts & Entertainment
- Amy Winehouse
- Kanye West