Just in time for the holiday season, Jakks Pacific toys has issued THE perfect gift for the "American Idol" fan on your Christmas list: The show's cuddliest judge, Steven Tyler, rendered in cuddly Cabbage Patch form. (This brings new meaning to the Aerosmithian phrases "rag doll" and "toys in the attic," huh?) Granted, seeing a Cabbage Patch Kid decked out in rock 'n' roll skulls, feathers, soulpatch facial stubble, and bleachy hair-streaks is a little disconcerting...especially since the doll actually kind of looks like the Demon Of Screamin'. Really, all that's missing is a string that the user can pull to make the doll utter canned catchphrases like "beautiful, just beautiful," "holy shipyard," and various bleeped-out expletives. (I guess the doll's must-have accessory, one of those little "Idol"-logo censor-paddles, is sold separately.)
The Steven Tyler Cabbage Patch Doll
In all seriousness, the doll is adorable (albeit in a semi-Chucky sort of way), and it's part of a series of celebrity Cabbages being auctioned off for a good cause. Jakks' celebrity Cabbage lineup also includes Al Roker, Katherine Heigl, Kristin Chenoweth, and Raven Symone dolls, all of which are being sold on eBay with proceeds benefiting the Children's Action Network (CAN), a national adoption awareness organization dedicated to finding homes for children who are currently in foster care. Each doll also comes with its own autographed birth certificate.